I Am Not Home (NEVER)

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I devised a small sign for my current residence to let family and visitors know when I am available or away. It might seem foolish in terms of home security. But, it serves a purpose. At the front and back, there is an extra door which can only be locked from inside; so, if someone is in the house and wishes to block all visitors (welcome-during-daylight-hours or unwanted-of-the-criminal-nature), usually late at night, they can lock the extra door. If I need to get into the house at night, I’d rather not wake people with a phone call (because someone locked that extra door while I was away).

The sign has two sides.

(MY NAME) IS HOME.

and

(MY NAME) IS NOT HOME.

Some days, I get careless (and discouraged) and leave the “not home” side showing when I am actually in the house. And, I’m starting to think I should always leave it that way. Why? Because I don’t feel at home, especially when family is sharing the space. And, when I am alone, the house feels chilly and eerily vacant; I crave companionship. But, ‘not just any companionship; I need people that make me feel comfortable and eager to get active, not threatened if I don’t do what pleases them in the moment, not threatened for being imperfect.

Thinking about the course of my life, thus far, I cannot recall ever feeling at home. If I ever did, it was when I was an oblivious kid who looked up to his parents as heroes. That image faded long ago, when the incessant bickering between my mom and dad became vexing. Even when I was not the wisest kid, my bedroom never felt entirely safe or secure. I never had privacy or my parents’ trust. Collected treasures and my own artistic creations have never been entirely safe from damage and elimination. I’ve felt more at home visiting a rare friend’s house than I ever did with family or on my own. And, with friends, I’ve always been uneasy about becoming too comfortable and pushing my limits.

Come to think of it, I’ve never been comfortable with my own family. When I think of all the family events I’ve attended and all of the trips I’ve taken with family, I don’t recall a single time in which my family did something with me that I liked to do and didn’t complain or rush me. If I have ever gone somewhere I actually wanted to go and/or found something I actually wanted to do, my family always–ALWAYS–finds a reason to fuss, complain and rush me, draining all joy out of the experience and sending me into a recovery spiral when I finally find an ounce of peace and alone time. If I ever felt comfortable sitting on someone’s lap or in their arms (or even just in their presence), it was so long ago, I’ve essentially forgotten.

I often enough find myself drifting into a daydream, a variation of one of the many TV shows I’ve seen. I picture myself with a wife and pets, stepping outside the house to speak with neighbors and venturing off to faraway vacation destinations before returning to my custom-designed comfort zone and art studio. Sometimes, I imagine having enough land to ride horses with my wife. They are refreshing fantasies. But, they lose their charm and make me nauseous when reality reappears.

Reality doesn’t seem to show a sensible path to achieving those fantasies. I mean, sure, there are plenty of advisors who will say it only takes this and that to get there. But, for me, it’s not that straight-forward or simple. I consider myself psychologically challenged. And, there are far too many examples of failure around me to alter my outlook. Only a thread of hope remains. Anything is possible.

I’m not sure how to wrap this up…but I’ll say this. No one comments on my posts, lately. So, you probably won’t even notice. Lights may be on. But, I’m not at home. I guess that makes me a nomad.

 

Chinese Astrology Speaks Greek Mythology to Me

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Holy ship! I just had another brainstorm! Kra-kha-kack-KOW-OW-ow-ow…!

I am not sure what brought be to this…maybe working on a nature-loving piece of art with a rabbit in the scene. I was thinking…what if I crafted a mythical Greek story with all of the gods and goddesses represented by animals? What animals would the iconic gods and goddesses be?

Well, Hera is often associated with cows; isn’t she the one called “cow-eyed?” And, there’s that story about Zeus, her rebellious, flirtatious brother/husband, in which he messes with another female entity, named Io, and has to disguise her as a white ox/cow to avoid Hera’s wrath (as if that would actually work).

So, let’s say Hera is a cow…or ox.

Now, what about Zeus? Well, there are a number of stories that mention Zeus in connection with some sort of goat. Wasn’t he raised/nursed by a goat deity named Amalthea? I’m sure he’s featured in the story about Jason, the Argonauts and the legendary golden fleece. [That’s a gold-flecked hide from a mountain goat, said to possess magical powers including healing (which led some to believe the fleece offered immortality), in case you didn’t know.]

So, let’s peg Zeus as a mountain goat (or ram).

Wait.

Look at the Chinese astrology zodiac (or wheel of animals). Where are the Ox/Cow and Goat/Sheep placed? In opposition of each other; they are at the dreaded six-degrees of separation. Unlike Kevin Bacon, this is said to be a bad thing in Chinese astrology. Opposites may attract, but you are normally advised to avoid pairing opposites found on this wheel. And, Ox/Cow does not mix well with Sheep/Goat.

That sure reminds me of Zeus and Hera. There was/is some sort of attraction there that lead to the painful union. But, more often, there is talk of how that pairing clashes and causes grief for so many beneath the sky.

Yet, the most “visible” and often powerful images of the Chinese zodiac have been the Rooster–which I’m inclined to call a phoenix–and the Dragon. [How many restaurants and pieces of silky clothing from the Far East feature the pairing/clash of dragon and phoenix? Plenty.] Astrology books call it a rooster. But, first of all, that casts out women (because roosters are males of the chicken variety). So, why isn’t the sign called the chicken or pheasant instead of rooster?

[Pause a second to consider why anyone would willingly pair two supposed opposites/opponents so often. If the zodiac advises opposites to avoid each other, why display them together on clothing and in places you visit to eat in peace and harmony? What good are fortune cookies if they come from an unpleasant pair of minds? Could it be the advice to avoid opposites is a flimsy ruse to preserve some foreign secret? Is this another Wizard-of-Oz tale telling us to look away from the man behind the curtain, while the real dragons and birds-of-another-feather live together in secluded bliss?]

Hera is also associated with peacocks; she supposedly placed a bunch of eyes on their tails (after one of her servants lost all of his eyes in a conflict with Zeus) to spy on her wayward husband/brother, wherever he might be.

Zeus likes to change his shape to avoid conflicts with Hera. That’s rather magical…like a dragon is said to be. While Zeus has never turned into a dragon (as far as I know), perhaps he could be the Dragon of the Chinese zodiac, considering he claims to be the king/head god…and what’s more powerful and dynamic than a dragon?…unless that dragon is no bigger than the smallest dinosaur and without any magical, mythical powers. [The dragon could be as lowly as an iguana; right?]

If Zeus and Hera are NOT the Dragon and Roo–Phoenix, who among the Greek gods and goddesses is?

Athena is associated with owls. There is only one bird slot in the Chinese zodiac, the “rooster” (*cough* phoenix). So, what if we substitute that pheasant with the owl? That works, I think…even moreso if we consider Athena’s “step-brother” Hephaestus as the Monkey.

Monkeys are the closest to humans; both use their hands. Hephaestus is the craftsman. So, why not peg him as the Monkey? He sits on the zodiac wheel next to his “step-sister” Athena. There’s a tale about Hephaestus trying to sleep with Athena; wouldn’t this placement make sense, in that case? Though, in Chinese astrology, negative pairings not only come one degree/slot apart but also three and six (while animals four slots apart are said to be the ideal triangles of happiness).

Athena is also occasionally adorned with a snake or horses. Snakes definitely think before they strike. That could be a form of strategy. As for horses, I don’t see the association with Athena…other than horses being used in battle to some advantage…and I know Athena likes to be on the winning side of conflicts, proving she had the wits to win.

Horses have been said to come from Poseidon, from the sea. [There ARE some known as seahorses, after all.] And, Athena has had her clashes with Poseidon. So, what if Poseidon was the Horse…would that make Athena the Rat/Mouse? I’d rather not think that way. I’m partial to Athena and not that fond of rats/mice. Rats/Mice can be cute and charming. But, at least, in astrological terms, they’ve been more trouble than they’re worth to me, personally. I don’t want my favorite goddess being some creature I don’t favor. [Also, how would one associate rats/mice with art?]

Rats are often considered thieves. And, who among the Greek gods has thief on their resume? Hermes. Rats are noted for their ears. Hermes has wings on his hat/helmet which could be seen like a pair of raised (rodent) ears. Hermes is also associated with escorting souls to the afterlife. Rats often dwell in a sort of underworld…the sewers…when they’re not scaring some humans up on the surface. So, if Hermes isn’t the perfect Rat…would the Rat be Hades?

Monkeys are often considered tricksters, players of games. Monkeys steal from humans in certain cities, where they are allowed to mingle among the human traffic and other commotion. Could Hermes be the Monkey? [If so, where does that place Hephaestus? What other animal screams craftsman? Dragons often are said to breathe fire. Hephaestus is associated with the forge, a place of intense fire within which he can craft the infamous weapons/tools of the gods.] Yet…what does a monkey have to do with death (or the afterlife)? Do monkeys dwell among bones or show any sign of interacting with spirits? I don’t think so…which steers me back toward pegging Hermes as the Rat.

What about the Rabbit? What god or goddess would fit that slot? Like the Rat, rabbits are also noted for their ears. In Alice in Wonderland, rabbits play a big role, especially the white rabbit, who leads Alice through a magical portal into the mad world of the chess pieces, playing cards and other odd creatures. Hermes travels at bewildering speeds between the land of the living and that of the dead to escort souls. Rabbits definitely are fast, speeding out of sight and popping up in places, sometimes emerging from…underground(!). Could Hermes be the Rabbit?

[I’d be okay with Hermes being the Rabbit. Peter Rabbit is a sort of thief; so that works. But, generally, I don’t associate rabbits with thieves. I’ve encountered many rabbits, and they don’t steal nearly as much as squirrels, birds and chipmunks. They just like to be alone in soft patches of rich green grass, nibbling at their leisure.]

What of Ares, the more savage “brother”/rival of Athena? Ares is the god of violent, fierce war (while Athena is considered the goddess of disciplined, strategic, carefully planned war). The only animal on the wheel that suggests savage behavior might be the Tiger. A tiger isn’t always fighting. But, in a fight, wouldn’t you expect a tiger to come out on top or leave the most bloodshed? Though…there IS that expression about unleashing the dogs of war. So, Ares COULD be the Dog. [Personally, I wouldn’t give him either slot…because I like tigers and dogs and hate violence and war.]

Pigs are said to be the “end of the line,” the final slot of the Chinese zodiac, the creature that cleans up after the others have left the party. Pigs are said to eat just about anything, even if it’s buried in slop. If “the end of the line” could be related to death, the end of mortal life, then could the Pig be the animal of the underworld, the afterlife? Could the Pig be Hades?

We’re neglecting two other rather noteworthy goddesses, Aphrodite and Demeter. Though some sources peg Aphrodite as a late addition to the Greek Pantheon, an occasionally unwanted/disrespected member for stirring conflict, along with her impetuous “offspring,” Eros (Cupid). [Some sources are not even sure if Eros came from Aphrodite, was her brother or was the first god of love/passion before she arrived.]

Among all of the Chinese zodiac animals, which would best represent love, beauty and/or passion? Isn’t that a bit…left to everyone’s opinion?

Some would hate to be compared to a dog. Calling some women dogs would rile if not deeply upset them. Some men might take pride in being called a “sly dog.” But, no man wants to be put in the “doghouse.” Yet, there are some breeds of dog which I consider rather beautiful. Pugs, in particular, are the sort of dog “only a mother could love.” They’re not especially pretty, compared to other species. But, they have a seemingly irresistible charm which wipes away whatever ugliness they might display. But, that’s just me; others like hairless dogs or dogs with hair covering their eyes. Everyone has their type.

I’d consider some varieties of snake to be very beautiful. And, snakes might lash out of jealousy, as any goddess obsessed with beauty (and potentially her own vanity) may do. But, a snake as the representative of passion? Surely, other animals on the wheel would be better models of passion. The Horse, the Dog, the Rabbit. Tigers are rather fierce and beautiful, to me. But, I’m not sure Aphrodite would want to get blood on her hands…or face.

And, what about poor Demeter, the goddess of plants, fruits and veggies, the harvest? Mother Nature, in a way; what animal best represents her?

On that note, I pause to free my busy head from this puzzle. I leave you, those who are kind enough to read this far, to ponder the matter, yourselves and report back to me with your selections. Who among the Greek gods and goddesses would you pair with each animal of the Chinese zodiac…and why?

Please share your thoughts in the comments, below.

Oh, What a Boot-iful Day 19

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Oh, look.  New boots on display at the Writingbolt Shop.  The display stand on the left is a spiral of astrological gems.  On the right, a web of colorful oddities.  And, up the middle, it looks like a tornado hit the place.  In fact, one pair of boots looks like a tornado, itself.

Astrology Question, Re: Rooster and Rabbit

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Okay, all you astrologically inclined people in WordPress-land.  I need your input.

Let’s say you have a Rabbit year paired with a Rooster year of compatible elements, with an 18 year age difference and the following favorable signs:  Sun, Venus and Mars are all very compatible with my signs.

Is this a favorable match even if Rooster and Rabbit are said to be trouble together?  Or, does the warning remain the same?

Also, if the Rabbit and Rooster are compatible elements and Venus and Mars are a hot match…but her Sun doesn’t sit well with his Sun/Moon…can this relationship still work?

Profound Thoughts: The Wrong Way Signs

Profound Thoughts with Writingbolt

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I see a WRONG WAY sign on one of my walks and begin to wonder if that’s not the universe speaking to me.

One of these days, I am going to turn away from that sign and walk the other way.

But, what happens when I reach another wrong way sign in that direction?

Where do I go, then?

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Where do I stop?