Posts Tagged ‘obsession

13
Sep
19

Tay Break: Reality Check Moment, 9-13-2019

***
So, I find myself asking myself, once more, why do I do it?  Why have I done this?  Why have I and why do I continue to give so much time and energy to it?…especially if I get no desired response?  And, why do I bother doing it HERE…where it’s much quieter than other places I’ve been and heard about…why not put it out THERE?  So many questions.

What’s this about?  Oh, you know.  My obsession with the lovely Taylor Alison Swift.

[Okay, you can stop groaning in the back!  All right!  I know!  Too many posts about her.  ‘Got it.]

I’m just having one of those moments when I question my purpose, my drive and my sanity.   I’ve crossed the one-gig line.  I have more than 1 GB of Tay Swift art on my computer.  I don’t know how much space other artists give, on average to their obsessive projects.  But, that seems like quite a lot to me.  It’s uncharted territory and makes me feel like I’m on some Star Trek quest.

I have a BUTT-LOAD of new pictures to present here in the coming months…well, aiming for her special birthday.  [Though that creative sharing finger of mine is itching to put them/some up sooner than later.]

But, why am I doing this?  I am not sure…I mean, I know I am putting my feelings out here…but what good is it doing?  I haven’t heard anything.  Haven’t seen…well, that’s the funny/weird part.

You see….

I get this feeling like someone IS passing my thoughts and ideas onto HER.  Or, she and I are so in sync that we’re sharing the ideas.  Because I’ve seen a few little things that make me think it’s true.  I’ve seen a few videos that seem fairly convincing…though I can’t often find any clear message in the lyrics, and usually learn later that the song was supposedly about someone else in the spotlight, someone who grazes HER personal space like a cartoon villain.  Spotlight on the silhouette over there, before we reveal the mystery star of the song.  [Seriously, some sorta Pokémon slash Cutey Honey slash Sailor Moon slash Speed Racer action in play.]

But, beyond these preciously curious moments…I am in doubt of my usage of time and energy.  …Except for the benefit the effort has given me, which is practice with my latest digital art program.  In a small way, being one of my biggest muses, she has helped me practice my personal therapy, my art (even if I haven’t drawn anything by hand on paper in a while…which depresses me a bit).  [ I can’t seem to draw on paper, anymore, without more “heart” to fuel my creative muscles.  I just don’t feel like drawing for practice, which goes against the good artist code.]

I have another reason that I am questioning my obsessive creative effort, but…can you believe I am kinda afraid to say it?  [I touched on it in my first big letter to Tay (in my blog archives).]

Not knowing how to wrap this up, I’ll just silently bow or nod and step away.

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07
Sep
16

My *Questionable* Pleasure (TV Show)

*****

Occasionally, I hear people on TV talk about their “guilty pleasures.”  I don’t like the word “guilty.”  Nor do I know what sort of guilt I should feel for watching a particular “reality TV” show which is both creative and humiliating, innovative and exploitative…  It’s a dirty trick on the mind.  It teases you with colorful images and fun games while abusing the participants who we are drugged to believe are willing players in a simple game.  [But, it’s not a simple game.  We are just duped like an audience at a Roman coliseum to root for either the lions or the gladiators.]

I am talking about CBS’ Big Brother.  I watch the show for a few reasons.  I tell myself it’s because I enjoy some of the competitions they invent, including the props.  I like looking at the interior decorating.  It definitely is a fun house design.  And then, there is the “beauty contest.”

Just about every year since its conception, I get roped into watching most of it.  Every time, I go through the same motions.  There is usually one pretty face I favor and root for throughout (unless she turns out to be a psycho bitch).  And, there are way too many annoying examples of southern-state, post-college-age delinquents who whine and whisper excessively in a desperate plotting way that just grinds the gears.  [I could easily skip over ninety percent of each show just to get to the good stuff which mainly consists of what are called “competitions” or “comps.”]

Last year, my heart went out to this crazy blonde gal.

bigbro17_heart-meg-1

There were two other contenders who lacked height but had their “perks.”  Shelli was the perfect blend of beauty and brains and had a good chance of winning.  Jackie…was just Jackie; plenty of assets, but my gut told me (as it usually does) not to fall too quickly for someone so “flashy.”

And, that verges into what I consider the shallow, exploitative side of the show which surely dives into some contractual pool any sane soul would not likely want to share with the media sharks.  [But, we the viewers don’t really see any of that; do we?  We just get the scandalous pictures.]

Anyway…

This year, these two exceptionally GORGEOUS young women stopped my heart.  Both suffered the same fate and are very close in age.  Both didn’t display exceptional brains or strength but sure have plenty of beauty.

bb18_heart-bridgette-dunning_850x700-1

A “traveling nurse.”  [Someone explain that job to me, please.]  Her radiant smile and lively hair just wash away any doubts you may have about her.

bb18_heart-zekiyah-everette_591x691-1

A “preschool teacher.”  Her eyes and lips are both comforting pillows and boxing gloves.  Her long, luxurious hair (hopefully all-natural) is the towel that fans you after losing a fight.

Both masters of expression appear like graceful pixies from some enchanted garden who dance over flowerbeds.  Neither is the easiest to catch, but their sweet voices call to you like the ocean.

My heart aches from confusion.  Part of me wants to jump through the TV screen and save the beaut–join the game.  Every year, I leave (watching) the show disappointed.  I should hate such exploitation.  An activist mind like Bridgette’s (a “feminist”) should probably not find interest in the whole mess, either.  But, she auditioned for it.  And, I am utterly smitten with her.  [I was smitten with Julie Chen, the US host, from year one!]

juliechen-bigbrother-cbs_greetaudience-animated-2

All I can do is let it wash out of my system like the tide taking part of the beach away every summer.

 

And, in case you are thinking I should get or have permission to use these images, I’ll just let Bridgette explain.

bb18_bridgette_dunning_cozyhat-goaheadshesays-animated-4

“Go ahead,” says Bridgette.

[She is just absolutely lovable.]

Well, there you have it.

 

26
Feb
16

20 Years of Personal History with Pokemon

*****

You’ll have to excuse me. In my haste to grab a piece of Pokemon mania surrounding the 20th anniversary, I downloaded some weird auto-correct system which occasionally interjects the names of creatures from the games.

I thought I’d take this time to share a bit of my history with Pokemon. [Prepare to “geek out” with me.]

* I first read an ARTICUNO about the novel release of two exclusive versions and collections of pokemon as Game Boy games so long ago, I forget the year. [Or, were they simply listed as portable games?]

* Then, around OCTILLERY 1998, I discovered the American/English version of the (Indigo League) cartoon series. On the plus side, I feel like a JIGGLYPUFF when I think of the artwork and CHARMELEON characters, including the protagonists. [Pokemon sucked me in just like Mega Man. I used to spend afternoons and evenings, after school, flipping through game manuals just to ponder the different robots and invent some of my own.]

The creatures alone are thought-provoking. Then you add the human characters who come with so many stories of their own. I was instantly swept away with the idea of three friends being free to travel around the world and experience so much just because they decided to catch and train wild animals, pursuing small tokens of achievement from what are classified as gyms (more like martial arts dojos).

Occasionally, a female character’s anime hair color turns me off. Gary, Professor Oak’s grandson, can be annoying. Clefairy is very annoying. Kadabra, Hypno and Jynx are a tad unsettling. I do TYROGUE of SEAKING the “heroes” ZAPDOS primary Team Rocket members over and over. Butch has a voice that makes eyes water. And, I do not need to see James dress like a girl/woman.

* In 1999, I risked being late for MACHOP just to fetch toys from Burger KINGLER. I can’t tell you how MANKEY times I made a RAPIDASH over there just to punch back into work, KOFFING and WEEZING. There were so MANKEY toys to collect, you couldn’t PIKACHU which one(s) you wanted. You just took your CHANCEYS. Maybe you had a few minutes and a nice cashier who’d let you fondle packs to check for familiar shapes.

* I remember one of the managers at my workplace voicing a strong hatred for the “evils” of Pokemon (essentially the part about humans forcing animals to fight each other). And, while I initially let his concerns fly over my SKITTY head, I gradually agreed with him. The fighting aspects are corrupting (of minds), promoting violence and cruelty to other animals. In a way, Pokemon is bullying glamorized by a colorful, whimsical package. It takes hold of you like cigarettes, an innocent social/stress-relieving drug until you turn hostile/defensive from withdrawal or suffer internally. [More on this, later.]

* I went a bit CRAWDAUNT with collecting; I’ll admit. [But, I won’t list everything I bought.] It started to feel like a sickness when I was GULPIN several Happy Meals (instead of just asking to buy the toys separately) and searching Blockbuster Video shops for “exclusive” items. Some items I could easily part with while others I suspect may stick to my hands. I wonder if the soundtrack from the show had any sway over my judgment. [There’s that Viridian City song in my head, again.]

* When the Gold and Silver (Johto) editions of the game were about to debut (before I had seen any Pokedex additions), I drew up an assortment of creatures I was thinking about submitting to the game company. When I saw the new line-up already had a Hoothoot, Noctowl and Totodile, I GHASTLY. They were in my sketchbook (under different names and slightly different in appearance). I am fairly sure I could pinpoint other creatures in the official listings that resemble my sketches. I know at least one frog strongly resembles one of the elemental lot I drew, mimicking the various forms of Eevee. [I chalk it up to two people having the same ideas.]

* By 2004, I was packing my obsessions away and looking abroad for adventure. I had to hide my Pokemon just to grow up and get outside my box for a while! So, I donned my Indigo Leag–er, fedora-ish hat and boarded a plane to Spain. When I NIDORAN into a BELLOSSOM, I knew I was in trouble. The strong winds made it double, leaving me quite devastated, at times. I sure felt like Brock on that trip, ogling so many pretty faces but never quite connecting with any of them. I tried to maintain Ash’s fiery enthusiasm, staying “on the road to Viridian City.” [“Come on; let’s go.”] Instead, I suffered similar setbacks from his short-sighted ambition/observation skills. And, when the time to return home drew near, I was more than a little Misty.

* Pokemon kinda DRIFTLOON off the TV radar over time. The last plot I recall involved May and Max (in the Johto series). Along came Digimon, Yu-Gi-Oh and many others which distracted me from asking questions up until 2008 with the TV signal change and–was it 2012?–when Saturday morning cartoons became a thing of broadcast-TV past. [Of course, anyone with cable or internet TV would not notice. They’d just shrug at my dismay as if a feather grazed their SHELDER.]

*In 2014, while babysitting for my sister, cable TV allowed me to introduce the original cartoon series to my nephew, keeping the volume down to a WHISMUR so I wouldn’t wake his brothers. At the time, I was curbing BELDUM during naps, playing a few of the old Game Boy games and one I had yet to play. And, while I had no interest in explaining the fighting aspects to him, I did enjoy discussing the characters. Since then, we’ve had moments of creativity in which we either draw our favorites or craft new characters.

*As of 2015, I’ve been able to introduce three nephews to the characters and some non-violent games found online. When word of the 20th anniversary reached my computer screen, I felt renewed enthusiasm.

Then, I saw the promo for Pokemon Go, the new project for 2016.

If you haven’t seen the video, I suggest you check it out. I cannot imagine grown people running around cities with “smart phones,” trying to catch holographic Pokemon in motion (as they magically appear) and/or gathering to “flash mob” Mewtwo. Actually, I can imagine idiots dodging work and causing traffic hazards/disasters with such foolishness. But, isn’t there a better way to advance/enjoy the craze?

And, again, why all of the fighting requirements? Game Freak/Pokemon, take a page from the Yokai Watch book. In that anime/cartoon series, the protagonist collects ghosts in various ways, rarely if ever resorting to violence. It’s about using his head instead of claws, teeth and laser beams. The Pokemon cartoons HAVE shifted focus from fighting with the Orange Island League, for example, using carnival-like challenges to earn gym badges. That’s much nicer than beating another animal senseless with deadly weapons/powers (though the fatal aspect is reduced to “fainting”).

Do not backtrack by promoting battles, again. Respect your lovely creations. Well, most of them, anyway. Some of these newer pokemon are a bit of a stretch in terms of sensible creatures. [If someone could explain the “mythology,” I’d be grateful.]

Hey! By working through my more serious feelings on the subject, I seem to have beaten the auto-correct system! I haven’t seen a single MISSING NO. since I went POLIWHIRL about the negative aspects.

[Awe; crud.]

To all the other Pokemon fans who read this post:

May you continue to be inspired and delighted by the characters. May you cosplay and craft to your hearts’ delight. But, should anyone coax you to battle, turn them down; walk away. And, save yourself a lifetime of gaming by observing pokemon around you in nature. Stop the pet abuse. The world doesn’t need more strays.

Sincerely,
Writingbolt

07
Oct
13

Chronic Christmas Syndrome, Seasonal Madness

Do you suffer from CCS? Chronic Christmas Syndrome?

 

There is a sickness here growing across the western hemisphere, an obsession with Christmas music which causes those afflicted to play it for three or more months in a year, eradicating the value of all other holidays and contributing to holiday decorations remaining stapled to the house months after the holiday season ends. These folks don’t suffer from winter/holiday depression. They THRIVE upon the “spirit” of Christmas and shove it down everyone else’s throats like retail store chains, turning the season of giving into the season of impulse shopping, road rage and trampling your fellow human being to get the not-so-big bargain of the week. All for the glory of the economy and those guys and gals who applaud opening the stock market every day for whatever reason.

 

If you live somewhere tropical, it could drive you mad with envy of those who have snow. If you live somewhere snowy during winter…and you’re really sick of looking at all the “dead” sleeping trees and traversing the ice and snow which can be genuine hazards yearly…not to mention the freezing cold which is rather unpleasant and can be as harmful to the body/skin as summer heat…you don’t need to hear sleigh bells for more than a month. Especially if you’ve ever spent a significant amount of time in a shopping mall or retail store.

 

In short, where is the autumn appreciation? This is like using sunglasses to stir soup or sticking freshly grown flowers in the freezer. Don’t ask me how I came up with those two. But, those of you with CCS are killing Autumn George by playing Christmas music before Thanksgiving is said and done. If Christmas George and Autumn George meet, the universe will surely collapse.




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