Posts Tagged ‘commercial

10
Dec
19

Happy Birthday, Tay Swift! Week 5

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So, this is it, the week to celebrate.   The special day is not far away.  [And, another special day is even closer.]  Let’s put together the pieces from the past few weeks.

tay-swift-2019-capitalone-card-ad-waitress-nurse-cats-clinic-placemat_ap-CSPP-18x12in-20B4RN-sample-1

tay-swift-2019-capitalone-card-ad-bartender-theater-cd-joke-cats-placemat_ap-CSPP-18x12in-21B26MN-sample-2

tay-swift-2019-capitalone-card-ad-catscafe-icecreamer-cd-joke-placemat_ap-CSPP-18x12in-22B1-sample-3tay-swift-2019-capitalone-card-ad-catscafe-icecreamer-cd-joke-bday-placemat_ap-CSPP-18x12in-22B1B-sample-4

tay-swift-2019-capitalone-creditcard-ad-starry-sullied-paper-placemat-poster_ap-CSPP-18x12in-8B-sample-1

In case anyone is wondering, the odd texture to the above and certain other prints is intended to make the pieces look like paper placemats you’d find at a café/diner, to go with the ad images.  The above also features typical “leftovers” from a café visit, the ketchup and mustard residue, toast crumbs and coffee cup stain.

tay-swift-2019-capitalone-creditcard-silhouettes-poster-cats-4someonblack_ap-CSPP-12x18in-5-sample-5tay-swift-2019-capitalone-creditcard-silhouettes-poster-cat-surprise-cuteyhoney_ap-CSPP-12x18in-7A-sample-1

FIND OUT, NEXT WEEK, AS THE BIRTHDAY TAY PARADE CONTINUES!!

And, now, some special presents for the birthday gal and her fellow adoring fans.

tayswift-bdaycard-2019-tay-photo-smile-sunny-flora-spiral-butterfly-name-poster_ap-CSPP-12x18-14-11-sample-1tayswift-bdaycard-2019-tay-photo-awe-twilight-flora-butterfly-name-poster_ap-CSPP-12x18-15-12-sample-1tayswift-bdaycard-2019-rainbowhum-tay-natguitar-cat-pick-glasses-poster_ap-CSPP-12x18in-19-16-sample-1

Happy birthday, Tay!

You’re something special in this world.

And, I hope I can always treasure you.

Sincerely, a very inspired artist who would love to create and travel this universe with you,

Writingbolt

 

06
Dec
19

The Birthday Tay Parade, Week 4

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One more round of the Masked Artist pieces.  Let’s hear it for…the ice cream scooper gal.

Next week, we put the past three weeks together and see what we get.  And, I’ll be posting some special presents for the birthday gal, including some pieces for her next big movie debut.  The movie pieces, whether or not they debut next week, will be posted the following week as the parade continues through Christmas.

20
Sep
19

I’m Sick of These M-F’n Tools Saving Every Species on the Planet!

***

That was my weak attempt at sounding like Samuel L. Jackson in that infamous movie about snakes on a plane.

But, let’s talk about a bigger tool.

Common, you’re such a tool. Those AI ads he keeps doing…just rub me the wrong way for some inexplicable reason. And, the latest one really struck a sour note.

One more pitch to save some “endangered” species.

I’ve got nothing against respect for nature and being concerned about all life on the planet. But, if nature decides to eliminate any species, we need not be responsible.

Do you understand what I am saying?

Nature decides what species will live, what new species will join the rest and which will become extinct.

As much as humans like to play god, and as much as Americans like to boast being the best at everything these days, we humans are responsible for the crimes we commit against nature as well as how much we are willing to treat it right. We are capable of maintaining the planet better than any other species. But, we cannot be the overprotective parents, especially when our energy and resources are needed to save ourselves from our own mistakes and from nature’s harsh backlash, probably for the crimes we’ve committed and thus are rightfully doomed to face.

If someone is pitching an AI solution to keep every species known on the planet alive and thriving, isn’t that a bit silly?

For one reason, what happens if, among all of the preserved species, new ones appear in small numbers? Well, we have to protect those, too. And, the next group? Yep. Them, too. Before long, we have a planet swallowed up in lifeforms without adequate resources to sustain them all, sort of like the junk lady in that 1980s Labyrinth movie piling stuff up on Sarah’s back.

[If I may be so blunt, are we just preserving these species because they make pretty photographs for some wildlife magazine you want to print on excess glossy paper which is just going to end up in a landfill when the multitude of shrinking attention spans cast them aside like yesterday’s hot topic?]

Ya know why the big ol’ dinosaurs went extinct? It wasn’t just some massive rock from deep space that created a sinkhole in the planet and devastated the climate. It was a population boom that couldn’t be supported by available resources. And, nature took them out, replacing them with a wide assortment of lifeforms, including us, sort of like an American football team replacing its most expensive player with a few cheaper ones to fill some holes in the defensive line. Now, we are the dinosaurs. And, if we don’t get a grip on our actions……..

Secondly, the planet will be overrun with technological gizmos, not just those keeping watch on every animal like some high-tech spies for some company surely getting something out of this access to what is probably some privacy nature did not intend us humans to take.

Those gizmos will require maintenance and resources we must provide, further depleting our time and resources which could be applied to means capable of preserving all life, not just one rare species at a time, invading the privacy of nesting and other rituals. And, just as your personal computer-phone puts out enough “heat” to fry an egg or your ear, and just as cellphone towers and electrical towers in general put out invisible radiation which impacts all life around them in negative ways, those flying and roving gizmos sent with the supposed intent of protecting all of these other species are sure to put out something that could very well be harmful to something if not everything in its path, because when have humans been known to create anything perfectly clean and safe? Mmm…never? At least, it seems everything we’ve made has had some negative output in the news.

[Can you imagine some drone appearing outside your bathroom, claiming it’s just making sure you’re still alive while you stand there naked about to take a shower? How long before that becomes so annoying that you change your washing habits and/or your whole daily routine, ultimately impacting your life expectancy? And, what if that supervising drone puts out some kind of radiation to scan your home and detect your body heat or some other signature? More invisible rays passing through your body and everything you hold dear, possibly invading your sleep cycle, causing you to wake with the feeling something weird was buzzing in your ear like a mosquito, a species we certainly do not need to preserve unless we are using them as weapons…and that is dangerous talk.]

[What if it doesn’t stop at drones? What if we get tags like all those species humans tag to track their numbers? That, too, is a human habit I find repulsive. Yet, we spend enough energy doing just that while water supplies and other resources continue to become hazards to us all. Would you want to walk around with some colorful plastic tab clipped to your ear or neck or ankle for the rest of your life? Maybe if your the sort who likes tattoos and/or piercings. But, not me.]

We are as responsible for upsetting the environments of all these other species as we are preserving them. But, two wrongs don’t make a right. And, yes, in a way, boxing every life form into some kind of human protection system isn’t right.

I know it’s a bigger and more vague goal to correct the other wrongs we have done to the planet, but that’s the homework we need to get done. Not being the policing, over-protective parents of the planet’s population.

If the world loses its snow leopards, it will go on. But, if the world loses its clean water supply or safe atmosphere, more than the snow leopards will suffer; all species will suffer. If one more human tribe puts its faith in nuclear power as a resource, more than a few snow leopards will suffer for a longer time than any human petition mob can survive to protect those snow leopards.

If you spend your time and resources sending machines to watch over some small cluster of one or two species instead of cleaning up the environment or protecting all life in a particular area you can manage, your effort is futile. If you are in a desert and give all of your water to a lone lizard you think is the only one of its kind, you will die in that desert before you learn that the lizard will be just fine on its own.

And, if no one bothers to read this, if it doesn’t make an impact on improving the way we humans treat the planet, then it was a waste of my time, energy and technology. All of which could have been saved had I not bothered to turn on the TV and see the man, calling himself Common, in one more lame commercial.

 

 

03
Aug
19

Tay and Capital One? Scary or Redeeming?

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So, I WASN’T imagining things when I caught a glimpse of the lovely Taylor Alison Swift in a Capital One commercial.  It exists.  [I just looked it up.  And, Tay, you are looking uber extra swiftly cute in those simple costumes.  Lovin’ the “easter eggs,” cuz, if you’ve noticed, I’ve been using some dedicated to you, too.]

But, in light of recent events with the whole hacking of Capital One account records/software…WHY?  Why is she suddenly aligning herself with the company?  Jennifer Garner has been doing ads for a while.  Did Tay do one previously that I missed or forgot?  If not, why now would she start?

On top of that, it wasn’t too long ago I heard about her having problems with securing her master records.  Is that the reason?

Is she in some sort of financial trouble and being forced to make some shady deals?  Say it isn’t so, Tay!

Please, Tay, be smart and stay safe.

If you are the angel trying to save Capital One, why?  It’s a credit card company.  It’s plastic.  It’s a temptation to mankind to spend what they don’t have and accrue debt they refuses to pay.  But, maybe, if you’re that good, you can set things right.

But, if you are not the woman I think you are, if you are involved in some sinister scheme…I don’t know what to say.

09
Apr
19

Fashions Signaling The World’s End?

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When Target commercials are worse than Old Navy commercials, I fear the world (of fashion) coming to an end.  Seriously, I don’t expect much from a retailer like Target.  I know they are not a “high-end” clothing store, but they used to have options I…well, liked.  But, some years after they began airing ads with trendy songs-of-the-summer and montages of jagged shifting imagery, and years after certain feature fashion designers started boasting their lines at the stores, Target seem to have lost their money-lovin’ minds.  I used to say the same about Old Navy.  I used to think Target put Old Navy on the endangered shopping list.  Now, it seems things have shifted.   And, that really scares me.  A place with OLD in its name showing clothes better than what you can get at what used to be a favored department store.  Sad times, indeed.

What am I talking about?  What is so bad at Target?  Let me put it as clearly as I can, in my personal opinion, mind you.  I don’t like pastels.  I detest melon orange and shades of aqua-marine/sea foam/turquoise, even if the last one is said to be lucky for Sagittarius.  I am tired of the same old striped crap that looks like the bottom of the wallpaper or card stock barrel.  I am tired of pants too tight for my man parts, apparently designed by gay folks looking to score some action in the rear…just sayin’.  And, in general, as I say again and again, I am astounded there aren’t more options and that, it seems, no one cares to design or make quality men’s clothing that isn’t cheaply screen-printed tees and sloppy pants or costly suit-and-tie combos that do nothing outside of an elitist boardroom or convention event.  It seems I will have to scrounge around the shady import websites, these “pop-up” outlet malls of the Far and Middle east, and pay ridiculous shipping, no doubt, to get anything more appealing to my artistic and heterosexual senses.

As if shopping for men’s clothes isn’t bad enough, these days.

Vent complete.

25
Jan
19

Too Much Advertising Ruins Sales!

writingboltVStheworld_scottpilgrim-fastspace_apsample-1****

Is there such a thing as too much advertising? You betcha. And, lately, some advertisers are getting WAY too much exposure. Thanks, digital TV systems capable of skipping commercials, though it works better in some modes than others which makes little sense…but that’s human technology for ya.

The days of diverse commercial line-ups seem to have drifted into the crapper. Now, we get ads that reappear every seven minutes, and sometimes twice in a three-minute window, because no one else seems interested in advertising.

You might think this is a golden opportunity to get cheap advertising/air time. But, hold your corny sales pitches and lame “real people, not actors.” An excess of ads spoils business. At least, for me it does. It’s like those movies that feature some poor shlub handing out flyers only to get bumped and spill the fliers all over the city.

I do not respond well to repeating commercials. I really get annoyed by them. And, the dumber the commercial, the worse I respond.

So, the next time you feel like promoting yourself, make sure your ads are spaced out nicely. Or, you will end up on my grumbly list. And, you don’t want to end up there. Because I will proceed to bad-mouth your product or service to the point that I annoy the people I meet.

Ever heard of the domino effect? Tim-stop-the-madness-ber.

18
May
18

Friend-Less, the Solution to “Icky Drama”

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[The setting: Woman-A meets with her friend, Woman-B at a cafe for lunch. They start talking and eventually reach a disagreement which gives Woman-A a bad case of indigestion and gas (because her emotions are tied to her digestive system). Woman-B decides to use the Ladies’ Room while Woman A maintains her distance and hopes no one complains about her flatulence. A female stranger, Woman-C, notices the discomfort of Woman-A and joins her.]

Woman C: Is your friend giving you digestive problems?

Woman A: Urp! *sigh* …Yeah.

Woman C: Then you need Friend-Less. She’s 100% human but without the complicated emotional upsets. You’ll never have to endure a conflict of interests, again!

Woman A: Sounds *B-Lurp!* great. Where can I find…uh, her?

 

[You won’t find Friend-Less in any restaurant, workplace, club, yoga class, pharmacy or department store. Science hasn’t worked out all the bugs on this one, yet. And, even if someone did, it would be a crime against nature (unless a higher power chose a lack of emotional upsets as a step in evolution, as an adaptation). ‘Sort of like any food/drink that has been tampered with to boast a lack of side effects. It’s NOT 100% anything except guaranteed to be manipulated.]




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